MURKY WATERS

MURKY WATERS

Who knew that the Boat Race, established 1829, would suddenly become an extreme sport quite as dangerous as off piste skiing? Campaigners like St Fearghal have warned us for years of the idiocy of Britain’s unregulated privatised water industry. Now in the days before the Boat Race, the rowers were told to avoid the traditional celebration of throwing the cox in the water, told to bandage cuts and blisters, as the Thames now has ten times the level of E Coli needed to earn a dangerous bathing warning.

It was the CAMBRIDGE cox who avoided the dunking, though the bookmakers had predicted an end to their six year dominance. The bookies’ favourites Oxford shot off so fast, I thought there had been a false start and went a length up, usually the end of the race. Not this time! Cambridge clawed their back using the advantage of the Surrey bend and went ahead. Drama as Cambridge got clear water for the Oxford boat lurched towards them in an attempt to bump. Much shrieking from the referee, warning Oxford to get back their side of the racing line. Cambridge pulled away for a wide margin win and the result survived a protest from Oxford. As the referee held up the white flag to confirm the result, the Cambridge crew splashed each other in celebrations.

“For Pete’s sake, ladies, don’t put your hands in the water!”

The EIGHT year old I am Maximus won the National, a triumph for the quizzers who had worked out that the first time ever, eight would be the best represented age group. Back when I was a toddler, the National was the haunt of slow handicappers who could not win at shorter distances. If you saw a once classy horse, you thought,”Owner think that horse is past its peak.”

The fences are easier now with the blessed benefit that there no fallers, just jockeys who fell off or pulled up beaten horses out in the country. Now the owners feel they can risk their rising stars. The winning trainer seemed to imply that I am Maximus was running a warm-up race for the 2025 Gold Cup.

Excited punters on ten horses might have thought they had a chance jumping the last. After a wet winter, jump fans were fearing an ugly slog through mud-no, the going seemed almost perfect for a steeplechase.

Ten chances at the last??With a sizeable chunk of the Snedden fortune on I am Maximus, I was already counting my cash for his jockey had just jogged him round on the brave man’s road, on the inside and never wasted a yard. The accelerator was pressed and I am the Greatest shot up the straight like the winner of a 5 furlong sprint. My first National winner since Party Politics. Google that and see how often I have made the bookies smile.

The world of professional golf is currently murky as the good guys struggle to fight off a buyout from Saudi oil money.(See also boxing, football, tennis, F1.)Rarely though has golf seen the stunning sequence of tournament play that the 2024 Masters winner, Scottie Scheffler, has produced in the last few weeks-three victories and a second in his last four.

Scottie has not played a round above par this year; hardly surprising his claims that God is on his side, cheering.

The main danger to his victory was whether his wife expecting their first child would go into labour during the tournament-the loving father to be declared he would put down his clubs and walk off the course. Scottie’s prize money was less than a Dean Burmester won in last week’s LIV event in Miami, watched by a TV audience of twelve. Dean Who?

At one point in the final round, there was a four way tie for the lead, giving hope to quizzers who’d predicted a narrow margin of victory. Scottie pulled away over the closing holes and his FOUR stroke win, his second Masters, demonstrated why he was the red hot tournament favourite.

Quizzers who’d put the mortgage on a woman marathon runner beating 2 hours 18 minutes were happy when they pulled back the Sunday curtains. A sunny day, no rain, cool enough with a gentle breeze perfect for fast times. Three of the leading four women in history lined up in Greenwich, including the world record holder and the Olympic champion. Perhaps this elite field was attracted by the prize money being at last equal to that for the men. It is after all the same distance.

From their first steps, it was clear clear that the answer would be YES with the target of beating the world record for the fastest time without a male athlete competing. The first four women home all beat that record. The Kenyan Olympic winner beat our target by a whopping 104 seconds.

Last month’s leader, Charlotte Crossley, missed all this month’s four questions, worth 12 points and tumbled down the table. Charlotte may be consoled by seeing her mother, Margaret Holder, as one of the six cute quizzers who got all four right. Her 12 points saw her move into second. Ann Medley started in the basement, proving how quickly the back markers can catch up. Paul Wearmouth saw him join his brother David in the top ten. Neal Watts galloped into contention; former winner Rob Pearce showed class is permanent.

All quizzers though need to doff the cap to this month’s top dog Monty Whitfield. Monty deserves a full bowl tonight. Monty really is a dog. Monty’s dominance may not last long as the domestic football season ends, followed swiftly by the Euros.